A little bit late, but it was topical when it was published in the paper.

“A frosty mist gathers over Tipperary and I am tempted to talk about the informality of an age that forgets the greatest of the lessons from the past, but I would just be ranting and my anger might even surface, and I am just too old to be an angry young man. Does that sentence even make grammatical sense or will my old English teachers from the Ard Scoil come looking for me in the shop. To be honest, I hope they do. I listened to them for long enough, so they can endure my ranting and correct me as they may. In fact, let them call and we will discuss why Hamlet is the greatest of the bard’s plays. It should be compulsory every year for Leaving Cert students, as should basic driving ethics. There is a shadow that is now nudging my fingers towards a subject that I am supposed to be writing about. Could it be wine?

I will discuss an incident that may shock some of you. Disbelief will leak from the pages through the ink smudged fingertips of North and South Tipperary readers, and the world will stop to listen, as you scream from the rooftops : “Sacré Blue – the French have cheated”. Have you read the words properly; have I, a card carrying lover of France and the French lifestyle written them? I have, for I cannot ignore the biggest story in wine for the last number of years. Every self respecting wine writer is discussing it, so I will fall into line and do my duty. The single biggest wine producer in the world, E&J Gallo of California, has a very famous brand called Red Bicyclette, which takes an American commodity view of French wine. After the success of the film Sideways, which preached the virtues of Pinot Noir, they decided on the need to capitalize on the American nation’s demand for a cheap version of this grape. They bought truck fulls of the stuff from local French coops through a negotiant, or agent. It was all running smoothly and sales were up until a recent development came to light – 12 local figures from the Languedoc region of France were convicted of masterminding a scam where 18 million bottles of plonk were sold as Pinot Noir. Instead of the much more expensive grape that Gallo thought they were buying, they in fact were sold Merlot and Shiraz, and by all accounts, not particularly good versions. The problem with Pinot Noir is that its yield is very poor compared to its compatriots, and it is also very difficult to grow, as it needs a very balanced mix of cold and heat and rain. If you were to sell the farm and move to France and become a winemaker, and some of us hold that dream dear, you would be foolish to start making Pinot. You would be pretty much guaranteed to be poverty stricken by year 2. With other grapes, you might make it to year 3 or 4, for as the old saying goes, “in order to make a small fortune in wine, start with a large one”.

The scandal’s big deception took place from January 2006 until March 2008 and 13.5 million litres of wine were consumed in America. The French negotiant who duped Gallo was caught like many a person or company gets caught, by greed. Their books showed that they were paying 40% under the going rate for Pinot Noir and further investigation showed that eight different wine cooperatives were in on the scam. It does not reflect well on the palates or decision making of the Gallo buyers, for there is a very distinct difference between Merlot, Shiraz and Pinot Noir. They are the victim in this case, but the reality is that their customers are.
The big danger now is that the greed of these commodity grape growers will reflect badly on the small artisan wine makers of the region who give their lives to their vines. These are the small family wine makers who cannot compete against Gallo and the other corporate wine brands that you see on supermarket shelves. Gallo will invest millions to defend their image after this scandal, but the small winemaker who had nothing to do with it might now also suffer. The timing is poor as the Languedoc Roussillon region is now finally being seen as one of the great value regions in the world. I have slowly being increasing my range and they are proving very popular. After my first contact with the winemakers I always get samples sent back to Ireland to re-taste and then I travel to see the winemakers’ cellar and walk in their vineyards and identify the grape varieties on the vine. I then know that the wine that I bring back to Ireland is the real deal and the feedback that is growing all the time justifies all the work involved in making sure that the customer can taste the difference. I firmly believe that by making the customer the focus of your business, you will reap the rewards in the long term. With this in mind, I am preparing for yet another portfolio wine tasting as it is the season for these things. I think I have tasted over 400 wines this month ( and spat them all I may add ), so my dentist is due a visit. Before that however, there are many more wines to taste – Wednesday sees an Italian and Australian tasting in Dublin. Have wine glass, will travel.”

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“Life is much too short to drink bad wine”